Freedom in Play
“I see you, Katie!”
If you have ever played Order in the Court*, you understand the equal amounts of disappointment and excitement that come with being seen and called out by whoever is currently ‘it.’ You are disappointed that you have been found and placed in ‘jail,’ but you are excited by the prospect of being set free by one of the other wild souls running about. Not to over spiritualize this game or anything, but does this not sound like your prayer life? You get disappointed when you cannot hear the Lord in periods of desolation, but you become excited when you remember Jesus’ ability to set you free from your chains and strongholds! Who would have imagined that scurrying through the yard and playing games with a bunch of kids could be so profound? There is just so much goodness to be found in the process of play.
Seeing as we all begin our journeys as God’s children, we are not completely removed from the ways of childlike wonder and freedom. But when we trade in our childlike identities for productivity, seriousness can become a deeply rooted habit that prohibits our ability to play and to find delight in the simple things. Don’t get me wrong—there is a time and place for seriousness, BUT the Lord didn’t create us to be stoic workaholics. He created us to be free and whole vessels of His love and mercy, so leaving room for play is actually important! But what do you do if you forgot how to play? Sometimes the only way to access these aching parts of your heart is through (somewhat forced) fun activities that pull you out of yourself and allow you to live into your identity as a son/daughter of the Father.
Since my Greenhouse Immersion Year began, I have begrudgingly played Order in the Court, Kuub, Empire, Code Names, Driveway Tennis, Skyjoe, and a handful of other (forced) fun activities. Though I have had to really let go of my pride as I spend my weekends losing games to a bunch of pre-teens, there have been so many small moments of release that have slowly freed me from the stifling seriousness I have been stuck in for years. Though I am still in the process of healing, I can feel myself slowly coming back to life as I run through the yard and laugh about seemingly meaningless things. And all I have to do is show up and allow myself to enter into the process of play, even though it can feel silly.
So, my advice to anyone feeling stuck in the rut of seriousness is to simply lean in to the process of play. Allow yourself to feel silly and to feel unproductive. I pray that these games, or games that you used to love as a child, become a bigger part of your life and spiritual growth. You are worthy of freedom and childlike joy! Enter into play; you won’t regret it!
*Order in the Court is essentially a hybrid between hide & seek, tag, and capture the flag.